It’s been just one month since I’ve been completely alone and in that time I have already been through the stages of relationship grief, landed almost completely on my feet and grabbed independency by the horns. I’ve had bad days, great days and ‘meh’ days but so far (as cliché as this will sound) I have learnt so much since being on my own.
Some of the things I have come to realise so far, are..
I am so much more capable than I give myself credit for. As scary as the world is to me at times, as lonely and as vulnerable as I can be, I still manage to pull my shit together. I don’t even know when that started happening because it’s not always been the case but I’m not complaining!
Those bad days do end. I may cry myself to sleep once in a while thinking of myself as a complete unlovable failure but then I wake up in the morning and it’s a new day. So if you’re feeling like absolute shit.. sleep on it, ride the storm, make a plan for tomorrow.
Actually, I am definitely an extrovert. It’s easy to think of yourself as an introvert when you have Social Anxiety but it’s not always true, I love being around people, my anxiety just makes it harder for me.
The more I work on my social skills however, the more I come to realise how much I enjoy other peoples company and how I love to go out and enjoy myself.
Music solves everything. And if I want to move my sofa into the kitchen and use my living room as a dancefloor, I fucking well can.
Exercising at 2am is the best. I’m a nightowl and always will be, I hate sleeping. Now I can exercise at stupid hours without pissing anyone off.
I’m not that lonely being alone. It’s funny because even though I have moments where I could kill for a hug or it feels too quiet living on my own, I’m still not lonely. I’m learning to enjoy my own company just as much as I enjoy the company of others. You don’t need someone to make you happy, they should instead complement your happiness.
I’m gonna be alright. And so are you!! Whatever it is you’re going through right now or whatever obstacles are in your way. You will be alright!
