Dealing with anxiety alone can be really isolating. Even if the people in your life know that you have anxiety and are supportive, it can still be difficult when you can’t talk explicitly about it to someone who knows what it’s like. For years I had no idea that other people would wake up in the middle of the night panicking about some tiny embarrassing
As I made my way towards the therapist’s office, I was my usual self; head bowed, hands in pockets, scuttling along at a frantic pace, desperately trying to avoid eye contact with the throngs of city centre workers and shoppers and the negative thoughts that they were so obviously thinking about me. “Skinny wimp”. “Unfashionable loser”. “Billy-no-mates”. Or the worst of the lot, “Black bastard”.
If your social anxiety is anything like mine, you’ll most likely have those persistent niggling thoughts every time you approach a social situation. They probe your brain and infect it like a virus, whispering nasty things not just to you but about you. These thoughts attempt to establish themselves as truth until we believe them above everything else. Thoughts that if said out loud by a real
The one thing I’ve learnt since being diagnosed with a chronic illness, is that it’s damn hard to keep a job and earn enough money to live when you’re sick a lot. Either you can’t do as many physical tasks at work as you used to be able to, or you’re drained and tired most of the time which makes going out to work incredibly
I answered the door to the postman this morning wearing tracksuit bottoms that are too short for me, my boyfriend’s enormous fleece and no make-up. And it made me realise how far I’ve come. As a child and teenager, I was so self-conscious and socially anxious that the things other people were doing on a daily basis were too difficult for me. To give